88 Comments
User's avatar
Shena (sounds like Shayna)'s avatar

This line, "If God was watching, he was trying not to laugh." Was so utterly brilliant. Thank you for sharing your gorgeous writing and song. 💕

Heather Ihn Martin Art's avatar

I’m so in love with that first paragraph. The whole story is captivating. Then the music video! 🤯 your art, no matter the form, is such a serious gift.

Amy's avatar

Captivating is right. Lovely piece

Birdiebee's avatar

Gorgeous words.

I’ve lived this story too. All over the streets of Oxford, London, Bath and Nottingham. The boy was Muslim though and I, Christian.

He never introduced me to his family and I had to let him go.

He is still in the crevasses of my mind, 20yrs later.

I still long for him.

Davey Boy's avatar

I too lived this, but it was in Vordingborg Denmark in 1991/92. We finally caught up with each other about 30 years later. I was back in the States after a stint in the military. It was surreal, but fine for only a month or so. I was “the one who got away “, but not of my own volition. It was her choice, a decision I respected but never fully accepted.

Thank you for this story. It brought me back to my college days spent in Princeton (though I audited Trenton State two semesters during this period).

It’s like I’m in my twenties all over again 🙂‍↕️but I no longer have to weather the storms.

Paul Palmer's avatar

Be sure to see my comment about my Danish love. That was in the late 1960's.

B. S. Wandruff's avatar

I subscribed before I was halfway through. You're definitely a writer. Thanks for sharing.

Claudine's avatar

Wow. This piece left me empty hoping for a sequel.

Janet Savage's avatar

Fantastic. No sequel please.

Eileen Levin's avatar

I wondered if he had vows to keep. A priest…….

Joni's avatar

Got my attention. Left me lonely. Beautiful 🙂

Robin Elise's avatar

Beautifully aching, achingly beautiful. Your works are always such flawless gems, regardless of medium.

DGB MI's avatar

I'm sorry, but celibate? No last name? Hanging out with Catholic academic types? And lying about his work life? Wow. To this old, recovering Catholic this is screaming "Priest!!" So sorry, but methinks you were duped. Lovely bit of writing, tho-

Suzanne davis's avatar

I'm not Catholic, but even I could see through that story. I question the woman's sense of self. Why, why hang onto what clearly ins in conflict about whether he wants you or not. No thanks , I'm not a door mat.

Coffee Jones's avatar

I never comment here but this is the best thing I've read on substack in years. Your writing touched me.

cyndidances@hotmail.com's avatar

Agreed! I've read a lot on substack and have never felt compelled to leave a comment.

Karla M Legato's avatar

Your writing seems to me to that you already are a professional writer and a gifted musician. Your song touched me and it was so Beautiful to listen to ! It seems to me that Robin definitely has feelings you and he is scared by his feelings and so he's been keeping you in limbo. You were correct to block him. But his persistent to reach you after being blocked, indicates he definitely feels something for you. But relationships can't last in a limbo state. The fact that he hasn't revealed his last name is a big RED FLAG and it makes wonder what he's hiding from you! As a mom, older (Catholic)woman (69) I think you are right about moving on. I remember how painful it was to be in love with someone who obviously had feelings for me but refused to to fully commit to me. When I finally let go, I dated for about 2 years and then I met the man who became my husband. 42 years now with 3 adult children who are all doing well on their own now. I'm still heartbroken about this guy in my old age. But I realize now how fortunate to be all these years to a man who truly loves me and I truly love him. My prayer for you is that you will meet the right man for you. Keep praying 🙏 God doesn't answer as quickly as we might want. But He will when the time is right !

Stop Fascism's avatar

Wow. So captivating -- I found myself wondering if it was real or fictional. Then with the video I realized it was autobiographical. So beautifully written -- the essay and the song. Thank you! You didn't need that writing program -- you're doing it. (And I was crushed for you when Robin admitted he wasn't a writer at all; just wanted to impress you.)

Lisa Hall's avatar

I was crushed by his cat and mouse game. My heart hurt for her. This story totally brought back memories covered by the years.

Sue Sanders's avatar

What a moving, exquisite story/performance of being a young woman. Very palpable!

DBN's avatar

i wouldnt give him any credit. bread crumbing narcs get no clout. cute story i wouldn’t quit yer day job though.

Davey Boy's avatar

Sure, narc comes to mind and married as others have stated. She may not be as polished as , say, James Herriot, but she certainly evokes memories of many of us. That has to mean something, unless you are being unnecessarily mean.

Suzanne davis's avatar

On target. I read a lot, always have and all these comments about "beautiful" writing made me wonder. Especially the ones who say they read Substack a lot. I thought it was OK. But what was the point? It seemed more than a little random and yes mean. Even the meanness was not enough to say it was the point.

Lisa Hall's avatar

I agree. Her writing made my heart ache...she totally brought me back to Texas.. that's where my heart goes.